This true, NSFW wardrobe malfunction will have you OMG’ing and LOL’ing as you cringe in horror.
There was a chill in the hospital locker room air. One of those manufactured, air conditioned chills that makes the hairs on your arms stand up and sends a little shiver down your spine.
Ms. X, as we’ll call the subject of this wardrobe malfunction (we’re keeping her identity anonymous, due to the nature of this fail), had just gotten off of a long shift in the OR, and was ready to go home to see her family. She was ready to unwind with a glass of wine, spend the evening with her husband and kids, and let the days’ hard work become a distant memory.
It wasn’t unlike any other day, really. She got up and went to work in the hospital OR as she did every day. She changed into her scrubs, performed her duties, and here she was back in the hospital locker room, reinvigorated to wash the day off of her and get back into the warm summer air outside the hospital doors.
She and a dozen other colleagues were talking and laughing as they all went through the same motions after work, changing out of their scrubs and into their non-work apparel.
Careful to change as quickly as possible and relieve herself from the cold hospital air, Ms. X pulled her shirt off as quickly as she could and replaced it with her more stylish graphic tee just as fast.
Next up, the de-pantsing and re-pantsing process. Pants off – check. But it was at that moment, pants at her ankles, when she felt… another blast of cool air…
… Only, it wasn’t on her arms or down her spine.
No no, it was down there.
What in the Sam Halston! She darted her eyes downward and quickly turned to face the lockers as she realized, Victoria’s Secret had let the cat out of the bag!
There she was, in all her post-op pride and glory, with her labia making an appearance for all to see. Oh hey! Here I am! Look at meeeeeeee!
Ms. X’s all-lace underwear had ripped wide open. In the worst possible place. Leaving nothing to the imagination of her co-workers.
That familiar feeling of dread washed over her – flushing her cheeks and forcing a pit in her stomach and her heart to skip a beat. Did anyone see? Are they going to ask me what’s wrong, she thought?
But there was no time to waste, as the longer she stood there so awkwardly facing the lockers with her pants at her ankles, the more conversation she knew she’d invite.
She carefully shimmied into her jeans on as quickly as possible, happy to pretend that nothing had actually transpired, and ran out of the locker room at lightning speed.
To this day, she has no idea who may have caught a glimpse of her horrific experience, but she knows first hand that she’d rather have her Secret kept than be put on full display for all her coworkers to see.
Needless to say, she did go home and have that glass of wine. She earned it.