As a mom myself, I now have the ‘in’ on what moms really want for Mother’s Day. Every year, I see countless Mother’s Day Gift Guides full of stuff. And while I love stuff, and I love to recommend stuff, I’d like to suggest a different kind of gift for your mom/wife/partner/girlfriend this year.
This gift can be completely personalized to your special lady. It’s just going to take a little effort and attention on your part to figure out how to best tailor it to her needs. (You have two weeks from today, so I’d suggest you start now).
THE ONE PRECIOUS COMMODITY ALL MOMS LACK, & ALL MOMS WANT
As soon as we give birth to our children, there is one singular item that leaves the house; shuts the door behind itself; and waves bye-bye as it drives off into the dark night – while we stare back longingly, tears streaming down our faces.
I don’t know a single mom who has enough of it, and if you give her this one thing for Mother’s Day (and there are so many ways to do it), it just might be the best thing she gets all year.
I’m talking about Time… Just time. Give her the gift of f&*king time.
It seems simple, and maybe even like something that she might not really want. But I can with almost 150% certainty guarantee you that she will love it, and she will appreciate it.
In THE WORLD OF MOMS, let me tell you the things that come before ourselves:
feeding the family, making the coffee (most importantly), feeding the dog, changing diapers, picking up the dog’s poop, doing laundry, doing dishes, cleaning the house, making a buck, educating our kids, instilling values in our kids, bathing and brushing their teeth, changing their clothes, handling doctor appointments, making sure the kids get outside, making sure they have mindful activities, teaching them to read, planning family outings, planning vacations, doing taxes, grocery shopping, taking out the trash, doing the nightly bedtime routine x however many kids we have, shopping for clothes for said kids, schlepping kids to school and sports and arts and musics and churches and camps and any other activity they could possibly come up with. The list could go on forever.
I think you get it… I hope you get it.
HOW YOU CAN GIVE HER THE GIFT OF TIME
There are very few hours in any given month that I get to myself. And looking back on it, this is probably how my mother lived – in constant caring for other people.
So below are some suggestions of nice things you can do for the mama in your life, that will give her the gift of time this Mother’s Day.
- Let her sleep in and wake up whenever she wants. Oh, glorious sleep! That figment of my imagination. The friend I once knew. I miss sleep. Moms just want a day to sleep in and not feel guilty that we’re not getting the kids’ breakfast ready or taking the dog out or throwing in a load of laundry. A day to sleep in is my kind of day.
- Bring her coffee (or tea, or protein shake, or whatever her pleasure) when she wakes up, just like she likes it. I don’t know about you, but I need to have my first sip of coffee within approximately 3 minutes of waking up. I even go so far as to set the coffee pot’s timer feature so that it starts brewing at exactly 6am. It’s like my alarm clock. Remember those old Folger’s commercials? The best part of waking up? So to have someone let me sleep in and bring me my coffee with just the right amount of Vanilla Coffeemate would be divine.
- Let her take a shower and get ready for her day, uninterrupted. I don’t know the last time that I got ready without anyone asking me for something. And nothing beats your toddler son just barging into the bathroom while you’re showering, just to pull up a stool & laugh at your lady parts while you’re simply trying to get clean. Give me one magical hour to shower, dress, and do my hair and make-up like the normal human being I once was!
- Plan an outing (or an in’ing) without the electronics, so you can really spend quality time together, uninterrupted from the rest of the world. Because at the end of the day, she really does want to spend time with you – not the Internet.
- Give her the day off from any formal mommy duties, all aforementioned. She would like to have that outing or in’ing without having to worry about all of the other stuff – just for one day.
- Okay, okay. I realize that all of my suggestions have involved no actual “material” goods. Personally, I don’t need my husband or kids to buy me a thing. I’m in that stage of my life where time is the one thing I don’t have, and that I want most. But, as I said, I do like things, so if you’re going to make a purchase, may I suggest a few of these: a good champagne, a sexy pair of heels, a facial or massage, or anything else that lets her be pampered and feel like the special lady you know she is!
Most importantly, get creative and do what you think she most needs. She loves you most!
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